We lose our ability to enjoy intimacy, when we allow protective barriers to linger in our life. When you let fear rule your love life you can prevent yourself from meeting your ideal partner. Embracing vulnerable opens you to the present moment and to see the totality of a person. Yes, as you share a piece of yourself, you cannot be certain of how another person will respond. This is especially difficult when you don’t receive the same level of compassion, acceptance or knowledge you expected. This may lead to anxious feelings and fears of rejection. But there is a real power in vulnerability. You open the door to a true romantic partnership.
Here’s six way to build vulnerability while dating:
- Embrace the goal of vulnerability: Understanding this skill helps two people fully know each other. It will allow you both to see if you are better off as lover, friends or acquittances.
- Shift your perspective on vulnerability: Contrary to what many believe, vulnerability is not equated to weakness. It is in fact a sign of strength. You are able to show your dates you are emotionally heathy, understand your inner world, and care about love. Vulnerability allows you to relate to and accept other people, despite moment of discomfort.
- It can be experienced differently at various points during dating: When you open up on a first date, it is quite distinct from the level of sharing months down the road. This is because the trust level is more developed with time. You have gotten to know each other and gain a foundation of trust. Early on, you are discovering shared interests and connections, but you hold back information about your romantic past. As you enter a committed relationship you want to understand the more complex parts of each other’s past. Remember being vulnerable is an evolving process that requires time, patience, and emotional investment.
- Go slowly as you being to open up: You didn’t build your walls overnight, nor will they come down so fast. Having patience is essential when honing a new skill, so tell does this shift in relation to other people. Make sure as you being to share more, you are on an even playing field and building a bond by taking turns regarding sharing, listening and asking questions.
- Know you are worthy: People may reject you occasionally. This doesn’t make you any less of a person. Avoid letting the protective walls come back up. As one door closes, it allows a person better suited for you, to enter your life.
- Practice self-care: Some things you share will be more sensitive than others. Perhaps you are a single parent, or have a traumatic past. Breathe through the discomfort and trust your instincts. Know that discomfort is common as you become vulnerable with someone. Notice how your date responds and if they are providing you with enough empathy, understanding and space to fully listen. Again, don’t take it personally if the person rejects you. Embrace your story and know the right mate is out there for you.
